Happiness

I'm not sure I've detailed how our move to Utah actually came about. It's somewhat personal, but that's what writing is about. It was a warm day in June last year. We were visiting my brother and his wife in Lehi, Utah on our way to a beautiful vacation spot in Bear Lake. We were sitting on a picnic bench in the shade and we watched while the kids played on the playground- which was new and pretty impressive. The mountains loomed largely next to me and spoke to me- Come to Utah. This is the Place- for you.    I left it at that and moved on- to Bear Lake and then home to Phoenix. Arizona- the hot and dry land of the South. Something must have changed for me because it was no longer a place I felt at home at. At peace with. I had a chronic migraine from months before and it continued unabated, despite all efforts to heal it. When someone suggested that I take it to the Lord and see what He was trying to tell me with this chronic pain, I did. The memory of those cool mount...

  First Day of School Pictures!  It seemed like we were still recovering from the summer, so everyone woke up a little tired. They still woke up a little early and pretty excited! Elizabeth had a 7th grader preview day so she went the day before and we had 2 first days of school! On the first day of school we usually do a yummy hot breakfast and homemade cookies at the end of the day.  This year I made cookies for Elizabeth but was all sugared out to make some more for the boys first day. We also do Priesthood Father's School Blessings the Sunday before. It seems like everyone will have a great school year this year! I usually get a blessing too, since I am starting a new year as being the Mom of all these school aged kiddos- and a baby. I got blessed that my headache will go away. Yay!  Elizabeth- 7th Grade. Ah! I have a 7th grader! She was excited and nervous and had a great day at school! She even ended helping others who were lost or who had ...

Declan at 16 months: Words: -Hot, tweet, tweet (for bird), Day-dee (Sadie), Mommy, Daddy, Mee-mee (binky), bankie (blanket), apple, too-tee (cookie), shoes Schedule: -Wakes up around 8, likes to snuggle on the couch with his blanket and binky for 5 minutes and then has a sippy cup of milk and some hard boiled egg in his chair. One nap 2 1/2 hrs later for an hour and a half and bed at 9. This little stays up until all the kids are in bed! Does not like: -Cereal (really?), having his diaper changed (cries almost every time!), me leaving, me saying no to a second cookie. -Baths. Still. He'll let me put him in with an inch of water but once I try to wash him up it's all over (he used to love baths but fell and hit his head once and now strongly dislikes them). Likes: -Mini chocolate candy bars (in small bites), cookies, string cheese, apples, english muffins, anything we are eating. -Standing at the sink on a high st...

pic stolen from Elizabeth's YW President The Monday after we got back from our family reunion in California, Elizabeth left for her week long girls camp with the Church. It was her first year (she's called a first year) and so she was super excited and nervous at the same time! Same as going to Seventh Grade! Lots of firsts this year! She packed up mostly all by herself and I bid her a tearful (on my part) goodbye at 7:30 that Monday morning. The Church owns a campground up at Heber Valley and that's where they went- along with a lot of other Young Women in the Church. And when I say campground, I mostly mean small cabins, an eating lodge, a lake with canoes and ziplines. This was not the camp I went to in the forests of California where we stayed up late in tents, scared of the bears that may be roaming around and eating any Beehive alive. Btw, have you heard of the movie coming out in Utah Once There Was a Beehive ? It's supposed to be super cute and Eliz...

I  still battle depression. Amidst the daily headache, which is very mild and has only been a constant in my life and not a needle prick in my side. Amidst the daily routines of Mothering and living. It hits me hardest from from 2-5 pm. And in the morning when I awake. It's dark and cold. A not wanting to be here. A lack of light and luster, of hope and encouragement. Some days I have no depression at all. The day ends and I look back at the day and say the "black dog" (as Winston Churchill called it) didn't visit me today and I am grateful. Oh, so grateful. This morning I went to a Kundalini Yoga Class in Salt Lake and sometimes that dregs up feelings you have to work with. All I want to say is that anxiety and depression are something that's out there. It may hit you or someone you love. If that ever happens, there is help available. Professional help and I am here. I can help. Just so you know.

So, Elizabeth, my oldest starts Jr. High on Tuesday. Ok, it's actually Middle School but it's for 7,8 and 9th graders so to me it is more like Jr High. She has been anxious, I have been anxious. Maybe I won't send her. I'll keep her home. I'll keep her close to me.  She's a great kid. She'll do great. It's just that she's growing up. She's becoming more independent. Again. I thought we did this already in Kindergarten. I've decided that life is always changing. Always. It is never static or complete. It doesn't stay the same. It's a moving river- not a lazy river- but a rapid one- and I better get on the raft and hold on tight! Things are changing!

We tie dyed tshirts, visited my sister and her cute, new baby in Logan, Utah, Ate ice cream at Thanksgiving Point,  Had date night at Thanksgiving Point Gardens (we do that a lot!) Went to Liberty Park in Salt Lake and Played in the rain.  It's been a wonderful summer! Bring on the school year!!