On Today

I felt nervous and scared. The only thing that calmed me was a phone call to the Temple to put my name on the Prayer Roll.

Earlier today I sat in the OB's office a week after my first ER visit. I had been having pains in my stomach and felt like they were from some Ovarian Cysts I had learned about during my last pregnancy.

The midwife was kind and gentle. She checked my bloodwork over the phone and from inside the room I could hear the words "abnormal?" " What's the normal level?" And "I'm worried about pancreatic cancer." The fact that my Aunt passed away from Pancreatic Cancer didn't reassure me. I sat and listened and thought. They talked about another abnormal test result.

When she came back in, she was cool and collected. Some abnormalities were found she said. I knew about one of them and the Dr had said it wasn't a concern. She said she may disagree with that. More bloodwork and an ultrasound was scheduled for tomorrow and I drove away. 

On the way home I stopped to pick up $9 of cherries, a dollar puzzle from a road side stand of kids cleaning their room. I kissed each of my children when I got home and headed upstairs to put my two year old to bed.