As a soon to be Foster Parent, but not as much as a current Parent, I am somewhat hesitant to blog about the depression I feel sometimes. And as I have to put some bacon in the oven and grill (George Foreman style) some chicken for our Super Chicken Salads for dinner, I will try to write quickly.
As most of you know, I have Bipolar Disorder. It was diagnosed 4+ years ago and since then I have been doing super well. I am pretty normal. I am stable. I take my 1 med. regularly and rejoice that I don't have to deal with many Rxs, side effects or high costs. I have a wonderful support group of Josh, my immediate family and friends I can chat with.
For the past year or so, I have gotten depressed for 2 hours a day- from 3-5 pm- almost every day. I can feel it coming on- a sense of foreboding- and it permeates my afternoon.
I am able to do the normal, same things- help the kids with their homework, unload the dishwasher, read, blog. But, there is a depression underlying it all. And I'm okay with it. I know that at 5 o'clock it will go away. I know that it's just for a short time.
But, sometimes, I get frustrated. Frustrated that it happens over and over again. Frustrated that things that I do -eat chocolate, rest, laugh at funnies- doesn't do much. Something that does help- sometimes- is writing. I enjoy writing. I have a shelf in my room full of journals from years ago. I like to put my thoughts down on paper or screen and often new thoughts and ideas pop out at me that I never considered before.
And so, dear blog readers, if at times I write something that has nothing to do with anything, know that it may just be me writing to unwrinkle the creases of my soul.
As most of you know, I have Bipolar Disorder. It was diagnosed 4+ years ago and since then I have been doing super well. I am pretty normal. I am stable. I take my 1 med. regularly and rejoice that I don't have to deal with many Rxs, side effects or high costs. I have a wonderful support group of Josh, my immediate family and friends I can chat with.
For the past year or so, I have gotten depressed for 2 hours a day- from 3-5 pm- almost every day. I can feel it coming on- a sense of foreboding- and it permeates my afternoon.
I am able to do the normal, same things- help the kids with their homework, unload the dishwasher, read, blog. But, there is a depression underlying it all. And I'm okay with it. I know that at 5 o'clock it will go away. I know that it's just for a short time.
But, sometimes, I get frustrated. Frustrated that it happens over and over again. Frustrated that things that I do -eat chocolate, rest, laugh at funnies- doesn't do much. Something that does help- sometimes- is writing. I enjoy writing. I have a shelf in my room full of journals from years ago. I like to put my thoughts down on paper or screen and often new thoughts and ideas pop out at me that I never considered before.
And so, dear blog readers, if at times I write something that has nothing to do with anything, know that it may just be me writing to unwrinkle the creases of my soul.
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