This picture was taken 3 1/2 months before my Bipolar Journey officially started.I have a few posts that I want to write-
one full of my favorite quotes from Conference,
one about our foster/adoption class experience *edited*
But something else has been on my mind.
I feel a special connection to NieNie- Stephanie Nielson. In 2008 she was burned in an airplane crash all over. In 2008 I also went through a life changing experience. I became severely depressed and then quite manic and diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder.
Just like Nie, I had to have some time to recover. I tried several different meds, until we found the one that was just right for me. I went through a time where I was zombie like, on two different meds and needing to nap or eat all the time. It was not a happy time in my life.
Just like Nie, I had wonderful family and friends that supported and loved me. Josh was there for me all the time, his family and my family supported us and gave us love and kind words of guidance. I also had Drs.- a therapist and psychiatrist- that cared for me and hoped with me.
Like Nie, I spent 3 weeks in the hospital, from 8-2 pm every day, manic and unable to sit still enough to cook, do laundry, sleep longer than 4 hrs, and do the dishes. There, I met people who scared me and motivated me to get better so I could get out there. There were also people there who were kind and loving and one who has become a good friend.
Like Nie, (who was planning) we were trying to have a baby when I fell into the Great Depression.
Like Nie, I had four children.
Like Nie, I have scars. Not visible ones, but ones that I carry around with me. The pain of reaching out to hold a newborn of one of the nurses at the Hospital and having him look at me like I had some kind of disease. The pain of having depression. The pain of trying to get pregnant again with the added issue of medication.
Like Nie, I have Hope. Hope for the Future. It has been 2 1/2 years since I've been stable. I have a few ups and downs- like everyone. We live in gorgeous Arizona. Our kids are- for the most part- happy and healthy. Josh was a wonderful job. We have the Restore Gospel of Jesus Christ, that gives us more happiness than I ever thought possible.
Like Nie, I am so very grateful for my family, my friends and for my life.
And like Nie, I hope to hold another child in my arms one day.
"I am not my body." Nie
This is my blog. My name is Megan Abbott.
-A video on Stephenie's new life. I cry every time I watch it.
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